Quick Tips to Show, Not Tell: How to Write Longing
Longing is a powerful emotion that can tug at the heartstrings of readers and leave them wanting more. So let’s explore how to write longing in a way that captures the essence of the emotion and engages readers.
Behaviour
Behaviour is a key factor in portraying longing in your writing. When a character is longing for something or someone, they may exhibit certain behaviours that can include:
- Constantly checking their phone
- Waiting by the window
- Becoming restless and agitated
- Daydreaming
- Obsessively thinking about the thing or person they desire
- Putting themselves in situations where they may encounter the object of their longing
- Going out of their way to please or impress the person they desire
- Silent crying
Interactions
Interactions with other characters can also help to show a character’s longing. If the character is longing for someone, they will exhibit certain behaviours when with that person, but also around others. These may include:
- Nervousness or stuttering
- Trying to impress the person they long for
- Engaging the one they long for in deep conversation to prolong their time together
- Avoiding eye contact to hide their true feelings
- Becoming jealous when the person interacts with others
- Making grand gestures to show their affection
- Becoming emotional when the person mentions leaving or being with someone else, or when others talk about this prospect.
Physical Signs
Physical signs of longing can vary depending on the character and the situation. Some common physical signs of longing can include:
- Racing heart
- Sweaty palms
- Lump in the throat
- Shortness of breath
- Muscle tension or trembling
- Flushed cheeks
- Loss of appetite
- Difficulty sleeping
- Weakness or fatigue
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Visual cues and imagery
Visual cues can help to set the scene and create a visual image for readers. When writing about longing, visual cues and narrative imagery can include things like:
- The setting sun to illustrate melancholy
- An empty bed to illustrate loneliness
- A picture of the person they are longing forto illustrate their constant presence in the character’s mind
- A heart or other symbol of love to represent the character’s feelings
- A locked door or closed window to represent obstacles preventing the character from fulfilling their longing
- A clock ticking loudly to emphasize the character’s impatience
- A scent associated with the object of their longing to immediately evoke emotions in the character and the reader.
Internal thoughts
A character’s internal thoughts allow readers to get a sense of the character’s desires and motivations, as well as adding depth to their personality. Some ways you can represent their internal lives include:
- Reliving memories or staring off into the distance
- Focusing on small details such as the sound of footsteps or a certain smell
- Being lost in thought or feeling detached from their surroundings
- Having imaginary conversations with the object of their longing
- Writing letters or messages they never intend to send
- Having metaphor-filled dreams
- Suppressing their emotions to protect themselves from potential disappointment
- Rationalizing their longing as something that cannot be fulfilled
- Feeling conflicted about their feelings and the potential consequences of pursuing them
- Reliving memories or staring off into the distance
Body Language
Body language is always a compelling way to show, not tell your character’s inner longing. This can include:
- Fidgeting
- Biting their lip
- Looking away when talking to or about the person they are longing for
- Sighing or slumping of their shoulders
- A deep gaze towards the object of their longing
- Fidgeting with personal items such as jewellery or clothing
- Clenching their fists
- Wrinkling their brow
- Tearing up or crying
- Unconsciously smiling when talking about the object of their longing
- Leaning towards the person they desire or those talking about them
- Standing still or frozen in place when in the presence of the person they long for
Internal Feelings
Internal feelings are perhaps the most crucial aspect of representing longing. When a character is longing for something, they may feel a range of emotions like:
- Sadness
- Frustration
- Anger
- Envy
- Hopelessness
- Desperation
- Restlessness
- Obsession
- Depression
- Anxiety
Attitudes
Attitudes to represent longing will depend on the type of character your are writing. They may have a pessimistic or optimistic attitude towards their situation, and attitudes can shift and change with time. You can play around with variations of these attitudes, depending on where a character is on their personal journey:
- Resigned due to unrequited feelings
- Determined in their pursuit of the object of their longing
- Guilty for longing for someone they shouldn’t
- Resentful of others’ attentions
- Ambivalent to everything outside of the one they long for
- Jaded by former bad relationships
- Vulnerable when with, or thinking about the object of longing
- Defensive when speaking about their desire, or when the object of longing is criticised.
Positive outcomes of longing
When a character finally gets what they have been longing for, it can be a rewarding and satisfying experience, which translates to a satisfying relationship resolution for readers. From the character’s perspective, it means they will have an increased motivation to emulate positive traits for personal growth and find happiness and fulfilment as they progress their relationship.
Negative outcomes of longing
On the flip side, longing can also have negative outcomes. If the character is unable to obtain the person they are longing for, they may become depressed or despondent. It changes the nature of a narrative resolution as well as their relationships with other characters.
Writing about characters who experience longing makes for a captivating and relatable story for readers. Whether it is a longing for love, success, or simply a sense of belonging, these emotions add depth and complexity to a character’s journey. By exploring the complexities of longing, an author can delve into universal human experiences and connect with readers on a deeper level.